The Role of Women
In Judaism, G-d is neither male nor female
The Talmud says both good and bad things about women
Women are not required to perform certain commandments
Certain commandments are reserved specifically for women
The first of the month is a minor festival for women
Men and women sit separately in traditional synagogues
The idea of Lilith as a feminist hero is based on a questionable source
The role of women in traditional Judaism has been grossly misrepresented and
misunderstood. The position of women is not nearly as lowly as many modern
people think; in fact, the position of women in
halakhah (Jewish Law) that dates back to the
biblical period is in many ways better than the position of women under
American civil law as recently as a century ago. Many of the important feminist
leaders of the 20th century (Gloria Steinem, for example, and Betty Friedan)
are Jewish women, and some commentators have suggested that this is no
coincidence: the respect accorded to women in Jewish tradition was a part of
their ethnic culture.
In traditional Judaism, women are for the most part seen as separate but equal.
Women's obligations and responsibilities are different from men's, but no less
important (in fact, in some ways, women's responsibilities are considered more
important, as we shall see).
The equality of men and women begins at the highest possible level:
G-d. In Judaism, unlike traditional Christianity,
G-d has never been viewed as exclusively male or masculine. Judaism has always
maintained that G-d has both masculine and feminine qualities. As one
explained it to me, G-d has no body, no genitalia, therefore the very idea that
G-d is male or female is patently absurd. We refer to G-d using masculine terms
simply for convenience's sake, because Hebrew has no neutral gender; G-d is no
more male than a table is.
Both man and woman were created in the image of G-d. According to most Jewish
scholars, "man" was created in Gen. 1:27 with dual gender, and was later
separated into male and female.
According to traditional Judaism, women are endowed with a greater degree of
"binah" (intuition, understanding, intelligence) than men. The
rabbis inferred this from the fact that woman was
"built" (Gen. 2:22) rather than "formed" (Gen. 2:7), and the Hebrew
root of "build" has the same consonants as the word
"binah." It has been said that the matriarchs (Sarah, Rebecca, Rachel and Leah)
were superior to the patriarchs
(Abraham, Isaac and
Jacob) in prophecy. Women did not participate in
the idolatry regarding the Golden Calf. See Rosh Chodesh
below. Some traditional sources suggest that women are closer to G-d's ideal
Women have held positions of respect in Judaism since biblical times.
Miriam is considered one of the liberators of the
Children of Israel, along with her brothers
Moses and Aaron. One
of the Judges (Deborah) was a woman. Seven of the 55
prophets of the Bible were women (they are
included in the list of biblical prophets).
The Ten Commandments require respect for both mother
and father. Note that the father comes first in Ex. 20:12, but the mother comes
first in Lev. 19:3, and many traditional sources point out that this reversal
is intended to show that both parents are equally entitled to honor and reverence.
There were many learned women of note. The Talmud
and later rabbinical writings speak of the wisdom of Berurya, the wife of Rabbi
Meir. In several instances, her opinions on
halakhah (Jewish Law) were accepted over those
of her male contemporaries. In the ketubah
(marriage contract) of Rabbi Akiba's son, the wife
is obligated to teach the husband Torah! Many
rabbis over the centuries have been known to consult their wives on matters of
Jewish law relating to the woman's role, such as laws of
kashrut and women's
cycles. The wife of a rabbi is referred to as
a rebbetzin, practically a title of her own, which should give some idea of her
significance in Jewish life.
There can be no doubt, however, that the Talmud
also has many negative things to say about women. Various rabbis at various
times describe women as lazy, jealous, vain and gluttonous, prone to gossip and
particularly prone to the occult and witchcraft. Men are repeatedly advised
against associating with women, although this is usually because of man's lust
rather than because of any shortcoming in women. It is worth noting that the
Talmud also has negative things to say about men, frequently describing men as
particularly prone to lust and forbidden sexual desires.
Women are discouraged from pursuing higher education or religious pursuits, but
this seems to be primarily because women who engage in such pursuits might
neglect their primary duties as wives and mothers. The rabbis are not concerned
that women are not spiritual enough; rather, they are concerned that women
might become too spiritually devoted.
The rights of women in traditional Judaism are much greater than they were in
the rest of Western civilization until the 20th century. Women had the right to
buy, sell, and own property, and make their own contracts, rights which women
in Western countries (including America) did not have until about 100 years
ago. In fact, Proverbs 31:10-31, which is traditionally read at Jewish
weddings, speaks repeatedly of business acumen as a trait to be prized in women
(v. 11, 13, 16, and 18 especially).
Women have the right to be consulted with regard to their
sex is regarded as the woman's right, and not the
man's. Men do not have the right to beat or mistreat their wives, a right that
was recognized by law in many Western countries until a few hundred years ago.
In cases of rape, a woman is generally presumed not to have consented to
the intercourse, even if she enjoyed it, even if she consented after the sexual
act began and declined a rescue! This is in sharp contrast to American society,
where even today rape victims often have to overcome public suspicion that they
"asked for it" or "wanted it." Traditional Judaism recognizes that forced
sexual relations within the context of marriage are rape and are not permitted;
in many states in America today, rape within marriage is still not a crime.
There is no question that in traditional Judaism, the primary role of a woman
is as wife and mother, keeper of the household. However, Judaism has great
respect for the importance of that role and the spiritual influence that the
woman has over her family. The Talmud says that
when a pious man marries a wicked woman, the man becomes wicked, but when a
wicked man marries a pious woman, the man becomes pious. The child of a Jewish
woman and a gentile man is Jewish because of the mother's spiritual influence;
the child of a Jewish man and a gentile woman is not. See
Who Is a Jew? Women are exempted from all
positive mitzvot ("thou shalts" as opposed to
"thou shalt nots") that are time-related (that is, mitzvot that must be
performed at a specific time of the day or year), because the woman's duties as
wife and mother are so important that they cannot be postponed to fulfill a
mitzvah. After all, a woman cannot be expected to just drop a crying baby when
the time comes to perform a mitzvah. She cannot leave dinner unattended on the
stove while she davens
ma'ariv (evening prayer services).
It is this exemption from certain mitzvot that has led to the greatest
misunderstanding of the role of women in Judaism. First, many people make the
mistake of thinking that this exemption is a prohibition. On the contrary,
although women are not required to perform time-based positive mitzvot, they
are generally permitted to observe such mitzvot if they choose (though some are
frustrated with women who insist on performing visible, prestigious optional
mitzvot while they ignore mundane mandatory ones). Second, because this
exemption diminishes the role of women in the
synagogue, many people perceive that women
have no role in Jewish religious life. This misconception derives from the
mistaken assumption that Jewish religious life revolves around the synagogue.
It does not; it revolves around the home, where the woman's role is every bit
as important as the man's.
Women's Mitzvot: Nerot, Challah and Niddah
In Jewish tradition, there are three mitzvot
(commandments) that are reserved for women: nerot (lighting candles),
challah (separating a portion of dough), and
niddah (sexual separation during a woman's
menstrual period and ritual immersion afterwards). If a woman is present who
can perform these mitzvot, the privilege of fulfilling the mitzvah is reserved
for the woman. Two of these mitzvot can be performed by a man if no woman is
present. The third, for reasons of biology, is limited to the woman. All of
these mitzvot are related to the home and the family, areas where the woman is
The first of these women's mitzvot is nerot (literally, "lights") or hadlakat
ha-ner (literally, "lighting the lights"), that is, the privilege of lighting
candles to mark the beginning of the Shabbat or
a holiday. The lighting of candles officially
marks the beginning of sacred time for the home; once candles are lit, any
restrictions or observances of the holiday are in effect. The lighting of
candles is a rabbinical mitzvah, rather than a
mitzvah from the Torah. See
Halakhah: Jewish Law for an explanation of
The second woman's mitzvah is challah, that is, the privilege of separating a
portion of dough from bread before baking it. This mitzvah comes from Num.
15:20, where we are commanded to set aside a portion of dough for the kohein.
This mitzvah is only in full effect in Israel; however, the rabbis determined
that Jews throughout the world should be reminded of this mitzvah by separating
a piece of dough before baking it and burning the dough. You may have noticed
that on boxes of matzah at Pesach, there is
usually a notation that says "Challah Has Been Taken," which means that this
mitzvah has been fulfilled for the matzah. Note that this mitzvah has little to
do with the traditional Shabbat bread, which is also called "challah." See
Jewish Food: Challah for more information about
the Shabbat bread.
The third woman's mitzvah is the obligation to separate herself from her
husband during her menstrual period and to immerse herself in a mikvah (ritual
bath) after the end of her menstrual period. The Torah prohibits sexual
intercourse during a woman's menstrual period. This ritual immersion marks the
end of that period of separation and the resumption of the couple's sexual
activities. For more information about this practice, see
Kosher Sex: Niddah.
Some sources point out that the name Chanah is an acronym of the names of these
three mitzvot (Challah, Niddah, and Hadlakat HaNer). In
the Bible, Chanah was the mother of Samuel and a
prophetess. She is considered in Jewish
tradition to be a role model for women.
Women's Holiday: Rosh Chodesh
Rosh Chodesh, the first day of each month, is a
minor festival. There is a custom that women do not work on Rosh Chodesh. A
midrash teaches that each of the Rosh Chodeshim
was originally intended to represent the one of the twelve tribes of Israel,
just as the three major festivals (Pesach,
Shavu'ot) each represent one of the three
patriarchs. However, because of the sin of
the Golden Calf, the holiday was taken away from the men and given to women, as
a reward for the women's refusal to participate in the construction of the
How do we know that women didn't participate in the Golden Calf incident? The
midrash notes that Exodus 32 says that "the people" came to Aaron and asked him
to make an idol. Aaron told them to get the golden rings from their wives and
their sons and their daughters. Note that the biblical verse doesn't say
anything about "the people" getting the rings from their husbands, only from
wives and sons and daughters, from which we can infer that "the people" in
question were the men. Then Ex. 32:3 says that "the people" broke off the
golden rings that were in their ears. The bible does not say that
they got the gold from their wives and sons and daughters; rather, it says that
"the people" (i.e., the same people) gave their own gold. The midrash explains
that the men went back to their wives and the wives refused to give their gold
to the creation of an idol. As a reward for this, the women were given the
holiday that was intended to represent the tribes.
The Role of Women in the Synagogue
To understand the limited role of women in
synagogue life, it is important to understand
the nature of mitzvot (commandments) in Judaism
and the separation of men and women.
Judaism recognizes that it is mankind's nature to rebel against authority;
thus, one who does something because he is commanded to is regarded with
greater merit than one who does something because he chooses to. The person who
refrains from pork because it is a mitzvah has more merit than the person who
refrains from pork because he doesn't like the taste. In addition, the mitzvot
that were given to the Jewish people are regarded
as a privilege, and the more mitzvot one is obliged to observe, the more
privileged one is.
Because women are not required to perform certain mitzvot, their observance of
those mitzvot does not "count" for group purposes. Thus, a woman's voluntary
attendance at daily worship services does not
count toward a minyan (the 10 people necessary to
recite certain prayers), a woman's voluntary recitation of certain prayers does
not count on behalf of the group (thus women cannot lead services), and a
woman's voluntary reading from the Torah does
not count towards the community's obligation to read from the Torah. The same
is true of boys under the age of 13, who are not
obligated to perform any mitzvot, though they are permitted to perform them.
In addition, because women are not obligated to perform as many mitzvot as men
are, women are regarded as less privileged. It is in this light that one must
understand the man's prayer thanking G-d for "not
making me a woman." The prayer does not indicate that it is bad to be a woman,
but only that men are fortunate to be privileged to have more obligations. The
corresponding women's prayer, thanking G-d for making me "according to his
will," is not a statement of resignation to a lower status (hardly an
appropriate sentiment for prayer!) On the contrary, this prayer should be
understood as thanking G-d for giving women greater binah, for making women
closer to G-d's idea of spiritual perfection, and for all the joys of being a
second thing that must be understood is the separation of men and women during
prayer. According to Jewish Law, men and women must be separated during prayer,
usually by a wall or curtain called a mechitzah or by placing women in a second
floor balcony. There are two reasons for this: first, your mind is supposed to
be on prayer, not on the pretty girl praying near you. Second, many pagan
religious ceremonies at the time Judaism was founded involved sexual activity
and orgies, and the separation prevents or at least discourages this.
Interestingly, although men should not be able to see women during prayer,
women are permitted to see men during prayer. This seems to reflect the opinion
that women are better able to concentrate on prayer with an attractive member
of the opposite sex visible.
The combination of this exemption from certain mitzvot and this separation
often has the result that women have an inferior place in the synagogue. Women
are not obligated by Jewish law to attend formal religious services, and cannot
participate in many aspects of the services (traditional Jewish services have a
very high degree of "audience participation" -- and I'm not just talking about
community readings, I'm talking about actively taking part in running the
service), so they have less motivation to attend. Woman's obligations in the
home (which are the reason why women are exempt from time-based mitzvot like
formal prayer services) often keep them away from synagogue. In several
synagogues that I have attended, the women's section is poorly climate
controlled, and women cannot see (sometimes can't even hear!) what's going on
in the men's section, where the services are being led. This has improved
somewhat in recent years, but men: if you think I'm lying, ask your wives.
But as I said before, this restriction on participation in synagogue life does
not mean that women are excluded the Jewish religion, because the Jewish
religion is not just something that happens in synagogue. Judaism is something
that permeates every aspect of your life, every thing that you do, from the
time you wake up in the morning to the time you go to bed, from what you eat
and how you dress to how you conduct business. Prayer services are only a
small, though important, part of the Jewish religion.
Lilith is a character who appears in passing in the
Talmud and in
rabbinical folklore. She is a figure of evil, a
female demon who seduces men and threatens babies and women in childbirth. She
is described as having long hair and wings (Erub. 100b; Nid. 24b). It is said
that she seizes men who sleep in a house alone, like a succubus (Shab. 151b).
She is also mentioned in midrashim and
kabbalistic works, in which she is considered
to be the mother of demons. Her name probably comes from the
Hebrew word for night (laila). She is similar to
and probably based on a pagan demon named Lulu or Lilu that appears in
Gilgamesh and other Sumerian and Babylonian folklore.
In recent years, some women have tried to reinvent Lilith, turning her into a
role model for women who do not accept male domination or a rival goddess to
the traditions that they think are too male-biased. For example, a number of
female musical artists participated a concert tour called "Lilith Fair" a few
years ago, and the name "Lilith" was clearly chosen to represent female
This revisionist view of Lilith is based primarily on a work called the
Alphabet of Ben Sira, which portrays Lilith as Adam's first wife who was
rejected because she wanted to be on top during sexual intercourse. Lilith was
replaced with Eve, a more submissive second wife. The complete story is
Many modern commentators describe this as part of the Talmud or midrash, or at
least a traditional Jewish source, and claim that this story reflects the
traditional rabbinical understanding of the roles of men and women. Feminists
reject the negative characterization of Lilith's actions in this story. They
claim Lilith was a hero who was demonized by male-chauvinist rabbis who did not
want women to have any sexual power.
Actually, Ben Sira is a much later medieval work of questionable authorship.
Ben Sira appears to be a satire or parody, possibly even an antisemitic one. It
tells many stories about biblical characters envisioned in non-traditional,
often unflattering ways, often with slapstick humor at the expense of
traditional heroes. Frankly, to treat Ben Sira as a reflection of traditional
Jewish thought is like treating Cervantes' Don Quixote as a treatise on
chivalry, or Mel Brooks' Blazing Saddles as a documentary of the American West.
scholarly critique of the use of Ben Sira to turn Lilith into a feminist
Links for Further Reading
Project Genesis offers an online course on
Women in Judaism, covering
subjects such as equality between men and women in Judaism, faith, prayer,
relationships, and feminine intuition.
Kresel's Korner, written by an
Orthodox woman, addresses many of the questions that people have about the role
of women in Orthodoxy. Kresel is an intelligent, well-educated woman who
responds to many feminist critiques of Orthodoxy and illustrates a very
different kind of female empowerment.
© Copyright 5756-5771 (1995-2011), Tracey R Rich
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